TALKING IT OVER
Memorial of St. Maximillian Kolbe, Priest and Martyr
My dear encountered couples:
We all offend others. Sometimes we are aware of it, sometimes we aren’t. Have you ever unknowingly hurt someone and then later found out about it from a third person? The one whose feelings you hurt went off and complained about it to someone else. What does Jesus advise? “If your brother should commit some wrong against you, go and point out his fault, but keep it between the two of you.” Why don’t we do that instead of blabbing it to others?
What is the important thing in the case of an offense? Patch up the damage! Usually the best way to do that is talking it over like two mature adults. Telling someone else isn’t going to solve the problem.
Like I said, some offenses are committed unawares. You can complain to everyone else for the rest of your life, but until the guilty party is made aware of what he did and given a chance to repair the damage, nothing good can ever come from your complaints. It takes courage to confront anyone. It takes courage to be Christian. But that is what Jesus wants you to do.
When having talked it over with the person concerned, maybe then a third party is required to help out. This is what Jesus says, “If he listens to you, you have won your brother over. If he does not listen, however, summon another.”
Keep in mind the good of the person who committed knowingly or unknowingly the offense. When you do that you are acting as Christ himself acts with you.
